NCAA theme music crashes in as the camera pans the huge crowd.

MARV ALBERT's voice shouts excitedly: "They're taking the court! The Couch Potatoes' super-talented point guard, Reid R., who's just been all-around brilliant the entire game, is looking determined."

DICK VITALE's voice: "But Marv, you can't ignore the steely passion that's written all over the face of Rita R., who has shown superb control of the Tube Zombies' backcourt. Ladies and gentlemen, I want you to watch Rita closely when they set this inbounds pass in motion, because she is really the key to this game . . ." [Continued]